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Losing my train of thought.
Oct. 7th, 2002 02:41 pmI've been having a hard time staying focused today. My mind keeps drifting back to this morning.. I've been driving to work lately because I have school after work and the train doesn't go near my school, but on the way to work, I drive pretty-muc right beside the train tracks...
This morning the trains were stopped. I heard on the radio that someone had got hit by one of the trains. It was erie, driving past them, all stopped in their stations and empty of people... Then there was one stopped just outside the station I get off for work. The police were there, the news people were there taking photos, about 30 feet from the train was a white sheet on the tracks.
So my mind keeps going there, wondering what must have been going on in that person's head to make try to cross in front of an oncoming train. I know it wasn't a suicide. It's one of the busiest stations and I see people run across the tracks in front of trains all the time, even though the gates are down and the lights are flashing and the bells are ringing. Cars do it even more often. They even drive around the gates. I've seen them missed by only seconds. But what would make someone do this? The trains pass an intersection in less than two minutes. That's shorter than a commercial break on most TV channels. Is risking your life like that worth it?
I also see the journalists, taking the photos, the police, keeping onlookers out of the scene.. I don't understand our fascination with blood. I couldn't be one of those journalists, looking at stuff like that every day. I don't know how they deal with it. Nor the police. It's funny, I guess. When I was growing up, I helped my father butcher deer and went with my grandmother to the meat-packing plant to have her cattle slaughtered. I should be more desensized to it than most people.. Then again, maybe I've seen enough of it to not be curious and want to see more. I guess that explains away the onlookers, but the police and reporters.. I wonder how they deal with it? I don't think I could.
This morning the trains were stopped. I heard on the radio that someone had got hit by one of the trains. It was erie, driving past them, all stopped in their stations and empty of people... Then there was one stopped just outside the station I get off for work. The police were there, the news people were there taking photos, about 30 feet from the train was a white sheet on the tracks.
So my mind keeps going there, wondering what must have been going on in that person's head to make try to cross in front of an oncoming train. I know it wasn't a suicide. It's one of the busiest stations and I see people run across the tracks in front of trains all the time, even though the gates are down and the lights are flashing and the bells are ringing. Cars do it even more often. They even drive around the gates. I've seen them missed by only seconds. But what would make someone do this? The trains pass an intersection in less than two minutes. That's shorter than a commercial break on most TV channels. Is risking your life like that worth it?
I also see the journalists, taking the photos, the police, keeping onlookers out of the scene.. I don't understand our fascination with blood. I couldn't be one of those journalists, looking at stuff like that every day. I don't know how they deal with it. Nor the police. It's funny, I guess. When I was growing up, I helped my father butcher deer and went with my grandmother to the meat-packing plant to have her cattle slaughtered. I should be more desensized to it than most people.. Then again, maybe I've seen enough of it to not be curious and want to see more. I guess that explains away the onlookers, but the police and reporters.. I wonder how they deal with it? I don't think I could.
